This is a delicate subject. As a Coach/Mentor for Empathic people I am hearing from many that there was abuse of a sexual nature in their past. And also other types of abuse as well. It seems to be common. I feel a need to write this today.
As I reflect on why this is so common among Empaths, the thoughts of innocence and what we broadcast come to mind. Empaths are innocent to the point that they are very trusting of people, until of course they are given a reason to believe otherwise. They see the highest good in even the most undesirable people. This is a common trait for Empaths. Here is the trait as listed in my article, “Common Traits of Highly Sensitive People or Empaths”:
- You are always cheering for the person who is struggling. People who are suffering, in emotional pain or being bullied get your attention. You desire to help all. You feel responsible for the well-being of those around you. In addition to wanting to help others, you connect with them emotionally, especially when you see they are suffering. This leads you to wanting to heal them or at least try to make their world better.
So Empaths are naturally altruistic. They live their lives being selfless and have much concern for the welfare of others. Here is another trait listed that is similar to the first one:
- You often don’t know how to take care of your own needs. You often say yes and don’t think of yourself, putting the needs of others first. You usually spend most of your energies on everyone else and are too tired to meet your own needs. And if you are a mother or single parent, this gets magnified and is much worse.
As you can see, Empaths end up getting the short end of the stick, so to speak, when they naturally live according to these two traits. And unfortunately it makes them targets. Especially from narcissists and abusive people. And it is not just the lady Empaths who are the targets. Though I hear about it more from them. I also have been the target of abuse in my past on three different occasions by people that are not members of my family. Thankfully my guardian angels were there to protect me, so I was able to escape the horror. I also have heard of it from other male Empaths as well. I can now recognize an abuser and steer myself and my family away from them.
How about in relationships? Here is another trait I list that discusses this:
- You often take full responsibility for how others treat you and for anything that goes wrong in relationships. You have a great amount of compassion and can clearly see other people’s emotional baggage. So you make many excuses for why people behave as they do. You try to keep the peace at all cost. This costs you emotionally and physically on an energetic scale.
Are you seeing the common theme here? Empaths are naturally people who want to serve others and give as much love to others as they possibly can. Abusers are the opposite. They want to take from others as much as possible and get joy out of hurting others and seeing them suffer. So Empathic people become the easy target.
Now there are a few more traits, that I do not have listed in my article, that come into play as well. Empaths emanate a feeling of energy, happiness and joy. This is part of their heart-energy field or as I call it their electromagnetic field (EMF). And also, as Empaths help to clear the lower vibrational energies of others, others begin to feel lighter and less stressed. These additional traits make it so that people feel better when they are around us, as a natural occurrence. I have undocumented proof of this and have seen it in action. I have also felt it when I am around other Empaths.
So Empaths are trusting and giving of others more than they should be at times. They love to love others and serve them till they have no more to give. And Empaths create a feeling of positive energy in others around them. It is ever increasingly important for Empathic people to recognize this and to take action.
First, recognize that whatever abuse you are a victim of in your past, WAS NOT your fault. Evil gets into the hearts of mortals and they prey on the innocent. They will have to deal with God and ultimately ask you for forgiveness. It is time to stop blaming yourself and begin to let it go. That is why I recommend the next step.
Second, I highly recommend that you begin today to seek a therapist or counselor to work through the emotions and let them help you become more at peace with the abuse so that you can begin to heal. And maybe even begin to forgive. This step is important as it helps to begin to clear your chakras. As they clear, your overall energetic field begins to become healthier, and you are more able to serve others around you. If you have already attempted therapy, may I suggest working with an Empathic Coach such as I. I can also work to find you one in your area as well. And sometimes it is easier to work with a female coach instead, depending on the severity of the abuse. But I require, that all Empaths who are victims of abuse, to have tried therapy first before Coaching/Mentoring with me. I am not a trained therapist or counselor. I am trained in finding the inner-resources that will help you to conquer your fears and help you to move on, when you are ready. And as an Empath I can relate on a different level and help begin the healing process. In addition, I am also trained in marriage coaching. So if the abuse is part of your relationship, we can focus there as well.
Third, being an Empath is mostly genetic. So it is a strong possibility that several if not all of your children are Empaths. And if you have adopted children, guess what, Empaths are attracted to Empathic children and you more-than-likely have adopted an Empath. Our children can be easy targets like we were. You must educate your Empathic children with the information in this article and any other articles that talk about this. Prepare them ahead of time to recognize and protect themselves.
I have held off on this subject because of how delicate and personal it is. But I can see that was a mistake as I am hearing about abuse survivors more and more amongst Empaths. I want each of you to know that you are not alone. There are many Empaths who are out there who want to just sit and mourn with you. We fully understand and can feel your pain. God also is there and knows your pain. He has angels assigned to Empaths all of the time. We are never alone and receive heavenly help all of-the-time. Many times we don’t recognize it. But it is there. Please, please, please be aware of how vulnerable you as an Empath are. Make sure you educate your children. And most of all, seek help if you have not, or are suffering. The sooner you heal from this, the sooner you can better serve people at a higher level. Become the Higher Functioning Empath you know you are meant to be.
With lots of love and light